Villagersonline : blogs : Ron : Persever or give up

Today is July 29, and that means that I have three days before my rent is due. The chances that I will have my rent to my landlord on the due date is not very high in probability. It is roughly the same as winning the lottery, with or without purchasing a ticket. I have no job, and no real prospects of being employed. I know that one day I will be employed, because the probability of me being unemployed for the rest of my life are fairly close to me having the funds to pay my rent in the next three days. As a Christian, how do I and how should I approach such bleak and desperate events or circumstances? Added to the factor of unemployment, and facing an unknown and formidable near future, I am also depressed.
Is it God’s job that he find me employment? Does God care if I am unemployed or not? Is God interested in me enough that He assists me in obtaining a job. Does intervene in our work life? There are countless questions that I have asked myself in the past, and over the past several months. I have never reached a workable and understandable answer to these questions. Using past experience as a gage, it typically takes me about one year to find a job. I have been at this for eight months now, and have filled out roughly 510 resumes (15 resume a week), and have had two phone interviews with no in person interviews. I have had my résumé’s looked at by knowledgeable people and with only minor revisions; they tell me it is good. It would seam that if I have sent out over 500 resumes and received no positive responses that the resume is not doing me any good, or that I am over qualified or under qualified for the positions that I am submitting resumes for. I can tell you with all candor that I have not submitted a resume for a job that I have ever done before, but all the positions I have applied for, I do meet the qualifications for the position. Example: I have never done accounting, but a great deal of the positions is in the accounting field. I had approximately 18 hours of accounting in college, back when accounting was invented. I am very capable of analysis of accounting information. I spent almost 9 years analyzing financial statements Last year I purchased accounting software, so that I could actually state that I have experience in the software being used. From my perspective, I am lacking one specific skill from being gainfully employed, or even just employed. I lack self confidence. And that comes from successful experience. I don’t feel like I am able to do anything, I am incapable of having any job. It has always taken me a very long time to find a job. Every job that I have had was where I showed up and they needed a body, or I was given the job. I look at job hunting as hitting a brick wall. I have to wait until I finally break through the brick wall,or I am broken. This is just how I see it from my past experience. It took many decades for God to take Israel out of Egypt, and then it took 40 more years for them to reach their Homeland.
I am not in a position to demand a job, or career from God. I am not in a position to require that God give me a job. I am not even in a position that gives me a thought that I deserve a job. I am only in a position to ask through my prayers. God knows that I need and want a job, so that I can support myself. And God knows that there are millions of people around the world that are just as capable and just as wanting as I am. We live in a world that is upside down and inside out. Is it right and honorable for me to think that I deserve special favors?
Until I am employed in some capacity, and to some degree, I must hit that brick wall as often as I am able to and with as much force as I have, and one day, the wall will come down, as if it were made of feathers. When is not known, but it will. I need to learn to persevere, and not become disillusioned and bitter. It can and most likely will get worse, but only for a time, and then life will get better.

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